it has been a long time i didnt come to this place n put even a single letter here... Totoro was once my story.. part of my life that has taught me a lot... taught me to say "NO", to reject something that shouldnt be accepted.. I really thank God to put this story line into my life... without it.. my life is incomplete, i might be the same old "stupid" person i was 3 years ago...
now is 3.22am n the sun is rising at this time.. it is not a weird scene to me after staying here for more than 3 years... Moscow indeed is a nice n pretty place for me... I like Moscow... but me myself i dunno y... may be i have my real part of life here in moscow...
Friends... came in n out of the storyline of my life... Once was close and now not, once was not n now is... i m scare to have frens n put up with promises to do sth together years later... but i hope i can... i hv this fren n both of us promised to nv leave each other no matter wut happens in the future... but how long can this promise stay? it's still a unknown answer.... i really hope i can go around europe with her, staying up at nite on her bed or someday mine in future.... hang out together.... but with all these hopes there always fears behind.... i fear i m the one cannot keep the promise or we are at one point being forced to give up... n say bye.. forever? is there any relationship that can be forever except from God's... i hv learned these years.. there r no eternal relationships in this world, even my godparemts love me so much n so do i.. in certain circumstances we have to give up in our relationship...
but deep in my heart i wanna still wanna promise her... i will never leave u... i really hope tht all my relationships will last forever n there will nt be a time to get far from each other.. but is it possible? i doubt... i really doubt.. the thing i hv least confident in my life probably is about relationship... i have failed to many times.... n i never want to fail again.......
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